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Monday, December 3rd, 2007
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9:18 am - why haven't I been posting?
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I created my own page. I don't feel like posting to 2 blogs, so i just post there. its mine, i built it, and manage it., so you can understand why i like it more...
http://pagantek.dyndns.org
enjoy!
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| Saturday, April 14th, 2007
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7:17 pm - lazy, but sore.
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I am pretty lazy. You can really tell by looking at when i last posted.
go ahead. say it.
So Lazy!
So what. im lazy, yes. is that so bad? there must be people that have drive, but there must be people with not so much drive, to work for those with drive. that's ok
in so lazy, im to lazy to talk about it anymore :P
im sore because i picked up a VW Bug. literlly. i had to move it 3 feet to the side, so i moved it. sigh. prolly should have done that.
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| Wednesday, March 14th, 2007
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11:56 am - People! Please! get a grip
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Your computer crisis is not my computer crisis. When you call me to support your machine, you do not help yourself when you start in on how much I suck and my company sucks, and then you refuse to provide accurate information as to what your problem is. if you tell me the problem is with Daylight savings Time, and I trouble shoot DST, dotn bitch at me if the problem is with something totaly differant, and its not fixed.
Suck it!
current mood:  cranky
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| Tuesday, March 13th, 2007
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3:39 pm - Better today.
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Well i feel better today. i slept for 3 hours when i got home last night then some villiany, then i showered and went to bed.
I have started writing my history. i started with a simple chat with V and now im up to 4 pages, and i havent even gotten to my graduation :)
So i might post it here in like a serial installment. Let me know if you'd like that.
current mood:  nostalgic
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| Monday, March 12th, 2007
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9:48 am - Not much better.
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Sigh. I will be so happy when i can close my eyes, and sink into my dreams. they seem to be much better than the reality that i am living in. All of the loves in my life are tainted with disgust and dread. work, home, sleep, kids, breathing.... you get my drift. I am ready for something to happen, to change the dull monotony, and it never ever does.
I told you all that this was a purging place. this is where i vomit up the things that fester in my brain and cause me greif, to try and achieve catharsis. It's not working..... i need lithium. if I go into an asylum will the voices stop?
current mood:  depressed
current music: incubus
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4:50 am - Please tell me it will change soon.,....
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i couldn't lay there awake in that bed any longer tonight. I still havent gotten to sleep. i might get back in it, but not right now. right now im sick and tired. Sick and tired of being horney and unsatisfied. tired of of hearing my love complain that she's sick, but not doing anything about it. tired of being mad that nothing ever gets done around the house unless I'm yelling. tired of seeing the sexiest person on the planet ignore my needs again. and again. and again. tired of being in the wrong body. tired of looking at this troublesome piece of flesh that i carry day in and day out in my pants. tired of telling myself that I'l get lucky tonight and it doesnt happen. tired of taking matters in my own hands. tired of this house. tired of this state. tired of this state of mind.
Please goddess hear my plea. change me to my desire.
current mood: discontent
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| Saturday, March 10th, 2007
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6:53 pm - My Poor Bus
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Some know about my 1970 VW campmobile bus. Manufactured in 1969 and outfitted in 1970 its a work of german art.
well, i worked on the valves putting them in spec and the bus started up just fine. after a quick tweek on the carb while GreenBear was over, I packed the family up and headed to Thomson, about 35 miles away to lookat a fish store. it was a great trip... until the way home.
the most important light on the dash (1 of 3) lit OIL PRESURE! oh shit. I pulled over and discovered that the engine was almost out of oil, it was missing 2 quarts of 4. i had a half quart in the cabinet and so i put that in and slowly worked my way back to the interstate. i managed to get to a gas station and buy 3 quarts, filled it up and tightened 2 bolts on the case. i drove home. It seems to not be leaking, so i hoipe that fixed it. What a scare. I hope my baby is ok.
current mood:  scared
current music: more wierd al.
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| Friday, March 9th, 2007
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4:46 pm - Brain drain.....
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today was sooooo long. i didn't want to stay on location (1st service call) They suck. 9:30 to almost 2pm sigh, and I was there last night at 7pm! your network isnt perfect and we cant fix it as fast as you think we can. jusst thining about your building and your programs makes me feel dirty.
Dr. Gumby, My brain hurts.
current mood:  dirty
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| Thursday, March 8th, 2007
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9:58 am
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bueller.....bueller......bueller......bueller......bueller.....bueller.....
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(comment on this)
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8:05 am - I'm FREEZING!!!!
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What leaves a wet spot in the bed after the lights go down? A hole in the waterbed. sigh - I am soooo coooold.
1:30am I awoke to something wet and chilly in the bed. i first think that the cat had pissed in the bed, but the cat has been put up forthe night. touch on the lamp real quick and sure enough. there is a fucking leak in the bed. its creating a pool about 20 inches wide and 28 inches tall. in the middle of my side. sigh, pull the covers over that spot and put a pillow on it. use my jacket as new blanket. sccot to bottom of bed to avoid the wet spot.
2:30am freezing and can't go back to sleep. this is a short jacket
3:30am what was that..? no, i thought i fell asleep, but it was just my imagination. so tired and cold
6:30am the alarm goes off. i was waiting for it, glowering at the time ticking up. i might have fell asleep, but i cant tell.i have changed the pillow to the top of my legs as if it were a really thick, really short blanket, and my stuffed elephant is my pillow, protecting me from the creeping wetspot. i roll over and grunt and swear, but i know, the alarm is going to go off again in 9 minutes. It's torture i tell ya!
7:30 taking child to school. still cold.
8:00 at work. people laugh when i tell them about the waterbed. sigh, im still cold, but now im tired as well.
current mood:  cold
current music: VM bitching at us about computers.
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| Wednesday, March 7th, 2007
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10:47 am - Open for business. Or open for something :)
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My friend GB and My friend V have both shown me their LiveJournal, and so i tried to connect to LJ. It said that my username was taken so i tried to log in, and sure enough, i had already signed up for this service.
So what does this mean? Cathartic release. i have been looking for a way to get some of my more disturbing thoughts out of my head, and this might be the media. I can't put it on my family site, because there's some things that the parents should never know.
Like Sex.
I stare and salivate at the cuties that i work with. not in the way that you expect though.... I am building up the courage to post more about this concept, and although i spoke to V about this in passing, i am not sure how much she knows or understands. I have talked to Wifey about it, and she understands, but is neutral about things like this.
current mood:  apathetic
current music: Weird Al "Do i creep You Out?"
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pagantek's journal